Grill Cheese and Ashes

Tomorrow begins another Lent and as I think about what it means to experience a holy Lent , my  hope is  Lent this year will be more than ashes and grilled cheese. For years I would begin Lent with a smudge of ash on my forehead, give things up (mostly food in hopes of losing weight) and miss the spiritual connection altogether.  Ashes on Wednesday,grilled cheese or fish on Friday and goodbye to chocolate and wine somehow did not equal spiritual growth.  So why do we give things up for Lent?  To prove that we can?  Why did Jesus go into the desert and fast for 40 days and 40 nights?   Maybe Jesus was driven into the wilderness by the spirit of God to show us that even in our own wilderness we can trust  God to fill us with what we need.  When we are  "fat, dumb and happy"  it is pretty difficult to see the signs of God at work in our lives.  Maybe the spiritual disciplines of fasting, and prayer help us to pay attention, and make room for God in lives that are too busy and too full. This Lent Lord, help me to focus less on my own wants and fill me instead with the desire to become more like you.